Renewal

I spotted some Spotted Dick

These past few weeks have been pretty nuts. I don't really even feel like going into it all, but all sorts of strange things have been happening. Family stuff. Work stuff. The stuff I do when I should be working. The stuff I don't do when I should and the stuff I shouldn't ever try. It's all there in the last few weeks. 

Chaos usually motivates me. Give me calm seas and I settle into complacency. Shake my world up a little bit and I will try to keep the ball rolling, at least for a little while. It's a good thing for the most part. Especially since the last few months have not been worthy of my Tackle 2011 project. I blame the knee in part, but I think I also used that as an excuse longer than I should have and for more than I should have. That said, I decided to throw caution to the wind and go on my first jog since my little MCL issue. Jog went well, though I am totally out of shape and I didn't push it past a mile. I was sore as could be, and so the next day I went on a bike ride with a friend in Charleston, and did some yoga. So, in addition to a sore knee, my thighs, ass, calves, arms, neck, and wrists all hurt as well. I am going to try to run again tomorrow, so I can totally overdo it. 

I am also working on some austerity measures in my day to day life. I am working on refinancing my house at a significantly lower interest rate (cutting the rate more than half, actually) and for 15 years instead of 30. All that and my payment will still be less than it is now, though just barely. Today I worked on my first batch of homemade laundry detergent!!! I found a recipe online for vegan detergent and I modified it just a tad.

1 C Borax, 1 C Washing Soda, 1 bar Dr. Bronner's castile soap, and ta-da! Less than 5 cents per load.

I took the detergent for a spin today and my thoughts so far are pretty positive. Most of my sheets and towels are white and I am always struggling to keep them bright. I hate the idea of using bleach, but I do use it just to get the whites brightened from time to time. However, one wash with this detergent got my sheets whiter and brighter than I can ever remember! It was pretty amazing. The only downside is that the laundry doesn't really have that laundry smell. Not that I like the overly perfumed detergent smell, but even the Seventh Generation detergent leaves a pleasant and light smell. Oh well. Maybe some essential oils will jazz things up?

It's not total austerity over here though...I splurged and bought an iPhone. I almost want to say that additional money spent on the monthly iPhone plan is less than the value added, so it's almost like I got a deal or something.

I ended the day making a brand new recipe! Never before! And it was fucking amazing, if I do say so myself. Roasted butternut squash with sage (from the garden!) and pine nuts over pasta. So freaking amazing. It wasn't too complicated, though it did require planning since I roasted the squash. Definitely one to save for D&C.

Day by day....

One of my goals this year is to go more places, do more things, live life a little more intentionally. It is not so easy to do, especially within the confines of life that makes it so easy to settle into routine. I really am making an effort. Even while I try to stay in the moment and not worry about the future,  I find myself almost involuntarily trying to prepare for the unknown and the what ifs. I find myself on this wandering path, not sure how I got here, not sure how to leave it behind. Not sure if that is even what I should do. Ok, so that was a bit tangential to what I was intending to write about, but at the same time exactly on point.

Not too long ago I found myself having a conversation with an almost stranger about the possibility of going on a camping trip. While this almost stranger was vouched for by a trusted mutual friend, I was still not convinced it would be entirely responsible or wise to run off to the woods with this guy. I took a step back and remembered my vow to myself to try new things. To go on more trips. It was like a test. All new experience, all new person, so many unknowns, so many risks. So, despite the little voice in my head screaming "Disaster!!" I decided to roll the dice....

And I lived to tell this tale....

I was thinking I would do a play by play for the folks who read this blog, but talk is cheap. I will say that I am glad I went. Glad I took a chance, because I was able to see some amazing things, take my dog on an amazing adventure, and get to know a pretty amazing person in the process. I didn't walk away completely unscathed though....I have a feeling I tore my meniscus during a hike the first day out. I will be limping around for quite a while I think.

So, I will conclude with some pictures of paradise. I will remember to take more chances, both with life and with people. Tempered always, but hopefully less so as time goes on. Life is too short, and I have watched far too much of mine pass me by already. So kids, let's go. Let's do this.....

spectator sport

I have time, and the perfect front row seat.

I am looking for the rules to these words. In them and around them. I rearrange these things so that they make more sense. I make them tell me things I want to hear. I make it so your words leave me guessing...but I always interject in the end.

Then there are the other words, the invisible ones, the ones we can't say to each other. The ones that aren't there. The ones we put there even when we shouldn't. We fail, more often than they do.

And sometimes they come like a storm, carried by some uncontrollable force and you just want it to stop! Just stop, please. Give me something a little less literal, because I don't do well with perfect angles. I can't respond, without using them as a weapon. It's best I don't.

Mostly these words are my constant and silent companion. I appreciate when they go together well, when they create, and when they destroy. The intent and the failure to convey. When you use them so perfectly.  How brutal and sweet, and how none of it really exists. The best they can do is mimic. The best we can do is mimic. Attributing any value to them will be our downfall, always. Is my downfall...

So many years, so much repetition. I wonder if they have served me well...

It's been a quiet night, except for the storm. I am just waiting for the trees to fall and this little bubble to burst. One day.

a fiddle and a fix

So, today I fulfilled the weekly requirement to do something new, and I think I made up for last week as well.

First thing I did was restring my violin (!!)  and then use my fancy new tuner to tune it! Yay! This is huge, cause I am a music dummy. Totally clueless when it comes to anything that has to do with instruments. So, this is kind of a big deal. Now I just gotta learn how to play it....

The other new thing that happened is not necessarily a good thing. So, it's been freezing here, we have had snow (enough to shut down my work for 2.2 days!), it's been cold. The snow has not really melted much...but anyway. I get home from work, start doing some laundry. I notice the water pressure seems way low....I shut off the washer, walk around....hear a strange noise coming from outside....so I go out there, and of course my outside water spigot has blown off the pipe and there is water all over the yard. I conclude that the pipes froze and burst.  I panic, call a bunch of plumbers, some friends. Freak out. No one is home, no one is calling me back...I go back out in the yard, take a look around, and I realize that the thing isn't necessarily broken...just one of the coupling thingamajigs had frozen and split in two. Around this time one of the plumbers calls back, tells me it would be $85 just to come out to my house, plus whatever it will take to fix whatever is broken. I tell him I will call him back.

So, if you have been paying attention, I am very careful how I spend my money. I don't do it lightly, and if I think I can fix something/do something myself, I will. So, I take the pieces of pipe and head to Lowe's. Fast forward 45 minutes and $5.05 later, and the problem is fixed. Whew. It's still dripping a little, so I will have to go out tomorrow when the sun is out to tighten it down. Hopefully it will be okay.

I will say this about the plumbing fiasco...it's times like these that it would be nice to have another person around. Yeah, I like being all sorts of self-reliant and whatnot...but it would be nice to have someone around to laugh about all the shit that happens, and to hold the flashlight for ya...someone with arm muscles.